Blogging with Dr. Susan


Blogging with Dr. Susan

Parenting...Susan Shows Parents the Way Back Home


This blog is inspired by a phone call!  Susan was called by a police officer who wants to know why todays’ parents seem to be raised without values and moral responsibility for themselves and others….


Okay…..My biggest concern is that families are increasingly giving up their first parental responsibility which is to teach their own children rather than let teachers do it for them! Parents need to stop complaining about their children’s schools, neighbors, community, and do something positive about each situation, including taking back their authority at home, where teaching begins at home!  As a parent trainer, I work every day to reassure parents that they can make a difference by using language that respects everyone, that teaches children to “do to others as you would have them do unto you” …let’s hear it for the golden rule. 

            This is a big motivating force for kids to develop good habits!  Parenthood is a job that never ends and begins before birth, and that means parents wherever you are responsible for closely supervising vulnerable infants, children and adolescents.   The difficult challenge news is that this type of monitoring, including visual sighting of what children are doing with their time, is not happening!”   

            Families seem addicted to over-scheduling and overworking out of the home environment, at the obvious risk of causing children to believe that since adults can’t read their minds, they won’t find out exactly what they are doing with their time. 

            Cell phone calls from parents are a great quick fix, but no solution!  Parents are guilty (there are good reasons once in a while) of increasing children’s privileges regardless of behavior and inappropriate actions, and worse, they are not starting an educational process early enough at home.  Sadly, the average household fails to give a child responsibilities early enough.  

            Parents, too quick to criticize and too slow to offer compliments and encouragement, are raising children who lack confidence and do not value good choices or good behavior.  They are the loud, rude and non-compliant kids you know! 

Is your child’s behavior a problem in your house?

Is your child out of control? It is a difficult time for everyone so here are some tips. Show your child what out of control looks like. As a parent you must set the example and clearly state what is out of control and what is not. Demonstrate what it looks like and do it quietly even if the behavior involves yelling or running away. Sometimes it is silly but always it should be private and not public so the child sees for himself what he is doing. Find something good to say about your child and say it. Positive reinforcement helps to achieve a happier sense of home. First though, parents should be an example and model family rules. If there are no family rules, sit down and reasonably set the rules. This may severely change the way you as parents behave. No yelling no hitting no strap. What are your strengths and weaknesses as a parent? If you need to change your behavior, then do it and tell your child why. The way you change your way of parenting will help your child even if it does not appear that way for several weeks. If you have changed then you have made yourself into a role model and with professional help you can improve your family’s home life.